I am a little late with this post as I am currently wobbling around in my third trimester but here are 6 things I wish I’d known before …

I’m going to skip the usual morning sicknesses, weird cravings and a sense of smell a bloodhound would envy you as you can find a lot on the good ol’ google.

Ok, so you peed on a stick and two lines showed up. Now what?!?

1 First trimester is a waiting game …

When the info finally sinks in, your first thought is to go to the doctor. You are buzzing to tell someone and your GP seems a safe port of call.

Spoiler alert: you can skip that appointment as they don’t even confirm anything.

You’ll probably get an instructions to start taking folic acid, to avoid brie and sushi and you’ll be handed a piece of paper that entitles you to(in the UK) free dental care for a year. No, Smilepod is not included.

What you should do instead is self refer yourself to maternity ward of your chosen hospital and than wait.

Yep, you’re pretty much on your own for the whole trimester until your first scan at 12 weeks.

On the positive note there is a lot of support if you have any concerns during this period. I have an amazing experience with Whittington hospital. They give you all the reassurance when in doubt and you leave without a feeling you’d wasted their time. 

2 Your body spreads in the most unusual places

It’s completely normal to start gaining weight almost immediately, which is really fun as the little one inside of you is like 12g but you’ve managed to gain a couple of kilos already. Oops.

The biggest shock for me was (besides the fact that my breasts quadrupled) my rib cage expanded and the wide selection of bras that make you feel good, you are limited to what could also be a small tent.

I’ve also noticed my hips jumped out and a whole new bunch of cellulite made itself feel like home on my thighs. You are turning into a big shapeless blob.

There’s nothing you can do about it but to keep yourself as comfortable as you possibly can.

The only investment I’ve done so far (and I am almost in my third trimester) is a couple of huge wireless bras (which already need an upgrade) and pregnancy jeans/tights. The latter are absolute game changers.

3 Your bowel stops moving

Sorry if you feel this is TMI … it’s real and it’s uncomfortable. This is actually a very common “side effect” of growing a human.

I am using quite a few things to keep it movin’:

  • linseed – a spoonful every day cleans your digestive system, great source of fiber as well
  • spicy sauces with every meal – Tabasco, Shiracha, Chilli sauces and chilly powder on everything
  • good old curry (the little one is half Srilankan so she better gets used to it :))

4 You grow fluff

This is not a drill. My body is covered with tiny white hair … something like a newly born eagle. The temptation to remove it is real but apparently it goes away on its own after birth. I will report on that. Until then I will keep persuading myself not to use Bubbles’ Furminator.

5 Your face reminisce a marble cake

Pregnancy brings out all your past sins of sunbathing without sufficient sun protection in your early twenties and rewards you with what I call “marble face” and what experts call melasma. During pregnancy you are prone to develop pigmentation that’s why wearing SPF 50 on a daily basis is the top skincare tip you can follow.

6 You become a queen of passing winds

Another embarrassing fact that nobody tells you about. An increased hormone progesterone will allow gas to build up in  your body. No problem with that you might think. The real issue is that you don’t have control of your muscles and it happens you drop one without knowing it’s coming so you can’t even prevent it. I mean it will happen in the most awkward situation. I promise 🙂

Don’t use all of your “but I.m pregnant” cards with your man just yet. You’ll desperately need them for the second trimester!